Don't know how many time I've said this. But I'm going to go for the millionth: CHEMO SUCKS!!! Today is the first day of my 4th chemo cycle, and as predicted about an hour after taking my tablets, Nausia hit and nothing was going to hold back the sickness. It's the sae story every time, yet I always hope against hope that each cycle will be different.
Obviously there is a positive, as we all know now, my treatment is working. Now I know that logically, this should make things easier, as there's a point to my suffering, but honestly? nope- it's still just as hard forcing yourself to take tablets that make you feel awful!
FOr anyone who still thinks tablets are a "chemo-lite" compared to IV chemo, I hope I have squashed this myth. Granted I am glad not to have IV, mainly (as my history of blood tests show) because my veins are notoriously difficult to find, and one session could take forever just to set up! But be under no illusions, the side effects are just as brutal.
Let's ignore the whole hair thing- as I've dealt with it before- but just a point, not all IV chemotherapy drugs cause hair loss either. By no means can you judge the strength of a drug on this factor. Neither should you assume (as some people have) that my condition wasn't very severe so "can be dealt with by tablets- isn't that good?"! It is the type of drug that determines the route, not the seriousness of the disease. my partiular drug "Temozolomide" is intended for my type of tumour (glioma) and can only be given orally. Trust me a recurrant high grade tumour is serious, whether chemo is given through needles or not!
The weird thing about the side effects, is that some are only present during the five day course, where as others seem to linger all the time!
Nausia and vomiting (I am glad to say), only seem to occur when I'm on the tablets. Tiredness seems to be with me all the time, but extreme exhaustion is only during the treatment period. My skin is constanly dried out, for the last few months I have had to smother myself in E45 creme to prevent soreness, and I also have muscle tightness/stiffness in my left choulder.
However on the good side. ALL my symptoms now appear to be caused by the chemo. I have NO tumour related symptoms anymore e.g No pressure headaches, No left sided weakness and No problems walking .
I still have a slightly numb feeling on the left side of my face and the old occaisional dribbling problem, but as these are most likely caused by nerves damaged by fits, I accept I may just have to live with these indefinitely.
It may not seeem like it, but I am actually a little more positive!! I'm used to these side effects now, know what to expect, and thankfully know that it won't be too long before the treatment's finished.
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