How I loathe thee DWP, let me count the ways.....

GRRRRRRRRR!!!!!! Okay, so now I've got that out of my system. Anyone who speaks to me regularly, or takes notice of my FB status updates will know that, as of late I have a bit of an anti-tolerence towards the DWP. For those people not in the UK, this is the government department for Work and Pensions, who are responsible for the majority of benefits received in this coutry, including ESA (Employment Support Allowance), which I am currently claiming. I know this is not the first time I have moaned about this particular group of fine fellows, but along with pretty much anyone who's had to rely on them, I find it hard not to get a little bit annoyed at times! My particular problem started 2 weeks ago, when I checked my bank account online and discovered I hadn't received my fortnightly payment. So I phoned DWP to find out what was happening. Now phoning itself, is enough to irritate... First you get a smugly recorded voicemail message telling you the numbers to press for different options; all irrelevant, as you'll be on hold for at least the next 15 minutes listening to Mozart's greatet hits (used to like Mozart, but now? not so much..). You are regularly reminded by recorded messsage, that you can phone back later, but what's the point? In my experience it's always busy no matter what time of day you call! So eventually I got through to a woman; lets call her "Bored and Sullen from Essex" (BSFE), and our conversation went a little like this: BSFE: Hello how can I help? Me: WEll, I'm claiming ESA, and I should have received my payment today, and I haven't BSFE (admist lots of exagerated typing sounds) ok..I'll...just...check...your...notes. OK looks like your sick note is out of date. Me: Sick note? I never sent one, I sent a formal statement from my consultant. BSFE: Well, it's expired. Me: I haven't received a letter to tell me this? BSFE: We don't always send letters... Me: Why?!?!? BSFE: It's the claiments responsibility to know when their sick note expires.. Me: (slightly incredulous) But as I have already told you I sent a statement with no expiry date BSFE: Well that is what the computer (Because I have no mind of my own) says is the problem, If you send a new sick note as soon as possible, the payment will be paid. So feeling a bit defeated I agreed, arranged a doctors appointment at my local surgery for later the same day ( I was having pre-chemo bloodtests again in the morning) and spent approximately 2 minutes with a locum GP, who'd never met me before, but quickly filled and signed a sick note, which I sent two days later (Weds 2nd May). Then two days ago ( 9th May) I had a letter dated 4th May telling me my medical certificate was going to run out on the 13th April?!?!- 21 days BEFORE THE LETTER WAS SENT!!!! I thought I better phone to check they'd received the sisk note I'd sent, and was once more treated to a 15 minute treat of orchestral music, before an actual person answered the phone. In fairness this guy was nice and relatively sympathetic (turns out he had personal experience with cancer- I didn't really push for further details) He looked and said apparently there was a "gap" of two weeks on my sick notes, which the computer didn't want to pay. I pointed out that given the condition it was unlikely better during those two weeeks (shock horror he agreed!) and said I often see doctors at my surgery who've never seen me before so they can't back date notes. He told me he'd see what he could do and get someone to call back, and they did. I have to admit this guy almost restored my faith in common sense prevailing; he admitted the computer system was "inadequate" and noted that although not officially confirmed yet, they had my notes through from the medical assessment, knew I'd passed so he'd "jump the gun" and get the payment into my account, he told me it would be paid on Friday 11th (today) I hung up the phone feeling relieved, until this morning, when I checked my account and...no money. So phoned DWP again. This guy was more in line with the generally sullen staff and told me it had been issued, but the money ould go into my acount any time up to 5pm, an I should just keep an eye on it!- just as well I have online banking set up, wouldn't want to hover by an ATM all day! However mysteriously I checked my account less than 10 minutes after hanging up and the money was there! Coincidence? call me cynical, but can't shake the feeling they were covering their back having discovered someone hadn't processed it properly! You see as a rule, I don't blame the workers on the phone; they're just doing their job, but the system as a whole is just so disorgnised and badly managed. Thinking it's acceptable to not give someone any money for FOUR weeks?! If I wasn't living with my parents how would I survive? Plus my parents are on a pension, and I do give them a portion of my benefit every two weeks, so they had to wait too. Trust me, despite the media's attack on people on benefits; I don't think many people would choose to put up with this stress...